When I was getting well ten years ago, I thought I was getting well mostly for myself and my family.
I was so depressed that I couldn't function. Couldn't eat. Couldn't sleep. Couldn't care for my family. I'd need something from Wal-Mart, pull out of the driveway, and then realize: I can't remember how to get to Wal-Mart.
Clearly, something had to be done. I needed to get well, for sure.
But God was doing so much more than I knew.
One of my favorite scriptures is Ephesians 3:20:
Now glory be to God! By his mighty power at work within us, he is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope. (New Living Translation)
That's definitely been true in my own life, in my marriage, in our family. God has done more for us than I ever dreamed possible.
But lately I've been seeing how, when I was getting well ten years ago, I was getting well for things and people that I could never have imagined.
Only God knew.
I had no idea who needed me to get well and tell my story.
But God knew.
And it's pretty crazy awesome.
The other night, after one of those encounters, Andy said, "This makes it all worthwhile."
Back in the day, when I couldn't remember how to get to Wal-Mart, if you had said to me, "Hey, some day somebody else is going to be blessed by all this, so it's worth it"--well, I probably would have slapped your face. If I'd had the energy.
But then the other night, just like Andy said, it's worth it. So incredibly worth it.
And, once again, Henri Nouwen was right:
"The call to be grateful is a call to trust that every moment can be claimed as the way of the cross that leads to new life."
All of us are in the middle of a story. We can't find Wal-Mart, and that's a bad moment.
But even that moment, God can redeem into the way of the cross that leads to new life.
And it's not just me that God is leading home in that moment. He's leading all of the Beloved, all of us together.
There's so much more going on here than we know.
His redemption goes infinitely beyond what I can dream.
So worth it.
Thanks be to God.